Keanu Reeve’s is in it. He was chosen as he could portray an “emotionless” Klaatu.

A trailer for Tron 2 was shown at Comic Con. It looks awesome.

They’re also remaking Robocop.

Note: I am clearly not the target audience for this movie.

This film lacks plot. An unstylish woman goes to work for a fashion place (because…of course, that’s obviously where she would work) and is mocked by everybody there, including her silly boss, played by Meryl Streep. So, one day she decides to get stylish and good at her job. She slowly loses all of her friends, her boyfriend, and her life. She is pursued through the movie by a guy who looks like Heath Ledger. Eventually, after she realises she’s turning into her evil boss, she decides to leave her job. She regains her friends. Awww…bloodeh loveleh.

Charlotte from Lost is in it for a minute.

I smiled twice during this film - the first being a scene where it’s a just a bunch of men talking, and they’re talking about potatoes. I like to think that this is the kind of stuff girls think men talk about when they’re not around. The second was at this quote: “I’m on this new diet. Well, I don’t eat anything and when I feel like I’m about to faint I eat a cube of cheese.”

This film is AIDS and cancer rolled into one.

I’d review it some more but I’ve decided to donate the text to a poor African country who can’t afford their own.

In Japan, at the back of a tiny shop, Square Enix has a single television running the 2008 Jump Festa FF Versus XIII trailer, which no-one has seen before. This really doesn’t surprise me for a company that based it’s headquarters on the advice of a fortune teller. What I gathered from the trailer (it’s on the Internet somewhere) is that our beloved silver-haired man is teaming up with a fugitive and a chauffeur to take down the Catholic church, who are the stealing the world’s supply of roads. Someone walked the the back of the shop and recorded it with a camcorder, unfortunately they couldn’t capture the sound, so they’ve put some random battle music over it. The video also cuts off before the trailer is complete - I imagine the person was caught and swiftly killed.

Other Stuff

• In HMV they had the boxset of all Azumanga Daioh episodes - with bonus Chiyo notepad and pen! But it was £60. Individual volumes were £20, which is ridiculous. Everybody who works in HMV is cheery and knowledgeable. Gunslinger Girl grabbed me with it’s cover, edgy text and the line “Little Girls, Big Guns.” They also had The Dark Knight OST. But as I haven’t actually heard the music from The Dark Knight I left it be. I bought nothing, which makes me sad.
• Glasgow East by-election FTW.
• Obama in Berlin FTW.
• There was some hubbubb a few days ago when some random website decided to announce that FFVII would be hitting the PS Store later this year, and that a FFVII remake of some sort would be coming out. This provoked Square Enix to respond that they had “no plans” for a FFVII remake. We’ll see.

Song Of The Day: Yuki - Hello Goodbye

The member “pie185″ was soo affected by Square-Enix’s choice that he posted a suicide note on the GameFAQs forum in which he told everyone what an affect the Final Fantasy series has had on his life. According to the rumor, the member has killed himself and hasn’t logged in since. I haven’t been able to find the post myself but our forum member Moklin, has a screenshot of it from YTMND.

I haven’t seen the post myself but I still really doubt there is any truth to it. If it is a joke and he really wanted it to get out then I guess it worked. Although if he really did commit suicide, he’s the ultimate moron and Square-Enix has more than their fans betrayal to be sorry for.” - FinalFantasy-XIII.net

I now weigh exactly 11 stone. By Tuesday the 29th of July I shall weigh 4 pounds less than that. I’ll keep you updated on this overwhelming challenge.

I’ve been doing forward rolls! I haven’t done forward rolls since year 7 or something. Although I did today knee myself in my glasses whilst doing a forward roll. But yeah, I is like Lara Croft an at.

Speaking of Lara Croft, I’ve downloaded the HD teaser trailer for Tomb Raider Underworld (I’m sure you can  find the trailer yourselves - this is the Internet for Christ’s sake.) It was epic. Lara blows up her house. It’s release date is November 21st. I shall be getting the PS3 version.

The British Motor Show starts today! Whilst it’s no longer a very important show, there are still some things to be announced. The Lotus Eagle’s real name is the Lotus Evora. That’s all the news there actually is for now. Honda are revealing their OSM concept there. I’ll be sure to bring word of that. Unless it’s awful, in which case I’ll never mention it again.

Other Stuff

• I went to bed at 3. Mwha ha.
• Calum’s in Scotland.
• I bought Rie fu’s ROSE Album (w/DVD!) on eBay. This is the only copy left in the WORLD.
• Taking photos at motor shows annoys me. I mean, you should take pictures of cars that you’re never gonna see again, like concept cars, or the Bugatti Veyron (check mah Flickr biotches) but otherwise you just shouldn’t. I look back at photos from Geneva in 2006 to see an Alfa Romeo Brera. Like, I can now see that whenever I want down at the Alfa dealer. Avoid cameras.
• I can “watch live coverage of the show as it happens.” …but, this isn’t like E3,  with everybody giving speeches…it’s just people walking around, looking at cars.
• I’d raid her underworld any day. It’s better that I say it now than have everybody saying it come November.

Oh, here’s the Honda OSM. It’s very dull.

Song Of The Day: Utada Hikaru - Living On My Own

“We did a tally recently, just for fun… and we killed a lot of white people [on Lost]! I can almost guarantee that we will kill more white people this season.” - Daniel Lindelof. I’ve taken this quote terribly out of context, but it’s still fantastic. And a fantastic way to open a blog post!

Hikki wrote in her blog! She’s been travelling a lot between Japan and America, working on stuff (she doesn’t point out a new English album though), and she got bored with domestic flying, so she now uses a private jet. Oh Hikki. Here’s a picture of Kuma Chang on a jet.

The Chevrolet Camaro rocks all kinds of awesome.

The Dark Knight has to be the most hyped film ever, in my lifetime at least. Indy 4 was…well, it wasn’t as hyped or as universally praised as this. Plus it turned out to be a bit crap. Jamie (Daily Grumble has been frozen in carbonate on the Links ‘N’ Stuff page, I Have A Mask…who cares, his new blog is Crackuranbo!) is looking for Batman Begins on DVD. It’s a good film, a very good film. The only thing wrong with it is the fight scenes are very flashy, and you really can’t see anything. This is especially apparent in the monorail scene at the end. That’s practically the only thing wrong with it.

Other Stuff

• Doing UKCAT on August 12th. Lucky me.
• I’ve deleted the worst episodes of Radio Potato, with the overall goal of deleting the entire thing.
• Apparently, Square Enix’s massive announcement that will “shock fans in attendance” is related to Advent Children Complete. What? “COMING EXCLUSIVELY TO HD-DVD.”
• Actually, have you seen how much HD-DVDs cost now? Like…£3, with the players costing around £20. It almost seems worth it.
• Lewis Hamilton qualified 1st for the German Grand Prix.
• Hoshi = stars, eiga = cinema…or movie, I have no idea.

Song Of The Day: Namie Amuro - 60s

Song Of The Day II: BONNIE PINK - Kane wo Narashite

It’s a sad state of affairs when the best thing to watch on telly is Big Brother. That’s why I’ve come here, to fill your minds with my mind, and my mind with rice.

Prepare for my Grains of Truth!

Did you know that rice is the most popular grain in the world?

But that wasn’t a grain of truth, that was the truth about grain!

Ahaha.

Anyway, I’ve bought the Final Fantasy VII Advent Children Original Sountrack from eBay. It was either that or Vanessa Carlton’s Be Not Nobody and Chungking Express. It looks like the special edition metal case one. Ooooo.

I’ve been filling in my UCAS thingy, and learning about UKCAT. It costs £60 to take the test, and there should be a testing centre “within 40 miles of your location.” Wow! The test itself seems to be all about American landmarks and identifying countries on a map. My application for medicine is somehow only eligible if I’ve taken this test.

E3 is still, despite much wailing and cries to stop, going on. I’m watching the Sony press conference for the first time. The guy has mentioned Final Fantasy three times in 9 minutes. Now why would he be doing that? Surely he’d not want to remind people that FFXIII is coming to 360? Aha, but, on August 2nd is Square Enix’s DKHΣ3713, where “a massive announcement regarding FFVII will be made.” Gee, I wonder what that could be*. And thus, Sony say the words “Final Fantasy”. A lot.

“Let’s talk about PlayStation 2.” Oh God no!

Other Stuff

• I must show my gravy flavoured ice-cream to the establishment! Hmmyes!
• I watched the first 20 minutes of 1927 German film Metropolis. It’s the best film ever made. It’s hilarious.
• I probably would buy a Jpop edition of Singstar.
• Sony are launching a 80GB PS3 here for £299. It doesn’t contain the features that the original 60GB does (backwards compatability…shiny stuff, etc.) so think of it as 2 40GB PS3s glued together.
• Sony are launching Platinum PS3 games for £20. I may pick up Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune. I liked the demo for a number of reasons: it was pretty, it was third person and it had clever AI. No srsly thy lik shott meh in teh hed an at.
• Yoichi Wada based the location of Square Enix’s headquarters on the guidance of a fortune teller.
• Here’s a trailef for the next Terminator.

*If it actually isn’t a FFVII remake or at least a PS3 compliation finale then I declare both Square Enix and Sony to be idiots.

Song Of The Day: Logan Whitehurst - Ohmygodimonfire

The Nintendo press conference was essentially a load of people showing us their holiday photos. I didn’t watch the Sony one, but apparently they revealed that movies and TV programs would be appearing on the Store, like, immediately. On the American Store of course. And that’s basically it. There wasn’t even a trailer for LocoRoco 2. But there might be in the coming days. There’s gonna be talk of Tomb Raider Underworld at 5.30pm GMT today. Yay.

It’s the incredibly dull Lotus “Eagle” (it’s real name will be unveiled at the British Motor Show). Yay!

Oh wait here’s a LocoRoco 2 trailer. That music better not be in the game.

Other Stuff

• I now have every car in GT5 Prologue, and there’s an update on August 1st which adds…stuff.
• I have every episode of KnoxKast and A-Bomb City on mah PS3. Woop.
• I’ve written 2 lines of my personal statement. It’s amazing.
• Japanese Xbox 360 users on 2chan (the largest forum on the Internet) feel “abandoned” by Square Enix’s decision to not realese the 360 version there. Awww.
• Woody Allen is still alive.
• You’ve been hit by the
  ^^^^^^^^^^^|
  |SEXY BITCH TRUCK ‘|”"”;..,___.
  |_…_…______===|= _|__|…, ] |
  “(@)’(@)”"”"*|(@)(@)*****(@)
  And it f***ing hurts.

I was getting bored with the Microsoft press conference, so I decided to stop watching, hence you’ll notice I didn’t report on the amazing looking new Viva Pinata game. Yes, quite. Anyway, who would’ve known that the president of Square Enix woud come on at the very end and say “Hey ewwyone, rook at riss movie!” and then show a 3-minute long trailer for Final Fantasy XIII, announcing that it’s no longer a PS3 exclusive. I mean, you just couldn’t have predicted that was gonna happen.

It’s still a PS3 exclusive in Japan, but that doesn’t really matter as no-one in Japan has a 360 anyway. Square Enix were in a spot of financial trouble, as I mentioned a few weeks ago, so it would seem they’ve done a deal with the Devil to ensure their future. As for what this means for the game itself, well, it was supposed to “take full advantage of the size Blu-ray has to offer”, so unless they release it on multiple DVDs for the 360, then the game is going to suffer. Oh, and the far-more-interesting-anyway FF Versus XIII is still a PS3 exclusive.

As for the trailer, well, the music was awful. Like, what happened? It was uncatchy random strings with flat generic drama in it. Just awful. The new scenes with “Pigtails girl” were awesome, especially where she grabs a disc from the sky and then summons Carbuncle, and the scene towards the end with the mountains (so..all the scenes with Pigtails girl then). Mr.33cm on his bike was great. The scenes with airships I didn’t much care for.

People’s reactions to the Xbox 360 news have been less than enthusiastic. Apparently there were people who bought a PS3 purely for FFXIII. Fools. I bought a PS3 because it’s awesome. But think - Square Enix gets money - good, Final Fantasy gets more fans - good. Of course, Sony lose lots of money, and Microsoft get lots of money…but oh well. And it was pretty funny how instead of Square Enix putting “Now for Xbox 360″ or some crap like that at the end of the trailer, they put “For PlayStation 3 Only in Japan.”

In other news, Top Gear was awesome. And I now have PSP firmware 4.05. It adds one new music visualisation - it’s either just the standard coloured background, or it puts water ripples into your custom background. Woop. I got my provisional license photo - I look like a murderer.

At their event with the stupid name in August, as well as the release date for FFVIIACC, SE say there will be a “big announcement for FFVII”. I say it’s either PS3 remake or the finale of the compilation.

Good news (I guess) - it’s started! This is the first time I’ve actually watched a game show live, it’s so exciting. It’s the Microsoft press conference. There was a funny trailer for Fallout 3. Then some Japanese guy came on to talk about Resident Evil 5. He had a good translator. Then some extremely sad guy came on to talk about Fable 2. He showed us his e-wife. Now Gears Of War 2 is being discussed.

Wait a minute - what the hell am I talking about. Fallout 3? Resident Evil 5? Gears Of War 2? What the hell is all this crap? Aha, of course, the only reason I’m watching the Microsoft press conference is because the Square Enix press conference comes immediately after. Aha! (In the event that they even show SE at all.)

Sooo…Gears Of War 2 eh? Soo…people actually play this do they. Interesting.

I wont be able to watch the Sony conference live tomorrow - it starts too late. But fate has seen fit to put me in a position to be able to watch the Nintendo conferecne. Joy!

Oooh, now the main Xbox guy is saying that he’s confident that they will sell more consoles this generation than PS3. But no-one was counting on…SONY’S NINJA OCTOPUS!

One of the funniest things about this is that you just hear one person clapping whenever something happens. I think it’s the cameraman.

Xbox have stolen Nintendo’s avatars! That’s…that’s low.

“Clothes will be released in the same way you go into a shop and see the Winter or Summer seasons.” ……… “Now instead of a list of friends you can actually see them (their avatars)!!” Wow, man.

This guy has a very boring voice. Only an hour and ten minutes till Square Enix!

Portal: Still Alive, an Xbox 360 exclusive. ZOMFG.

…I have no idea what’s going on now. There are cows.

This is poor. Even for Microsoft.

By the way, that Portal game is just some Live Arcade thing. Probably should’ve mentioned that before.

“I’m typing it on Word and everything.” - Jamie, on his novel.

By the way, this is the last series of Richard & Judy. They’ve been moved to some new show on UKTV “Watch”. This wasn’t announced at E3 you understand…although I wouldn’t count out Microsoft from pulling both of them on stage any minute.

:O It’s the box art for Tomb Raider Underworld. And there’ll be a teaser trailer at E3. The Microsoft press conference starts in 4 hours, with Square Enix following. Sony’s or that other company’s aren’t until tomorrow. You’ll be glad to know that I’ll be covering every bit of worthwhile news right here on this blog. You betcha. PSP firmware 4.05 is out, it adds more music visualizers. I haven’t got it yet because my PSP won’t allow me to update due to low battery level. Awww.

I’m going to get a photograph for my provisional drivers license later. Yay.

MSN describes the British Motor Show as “one of the greatest car festivals in the world”. Someone should really tell them that it isn’t.

Go team Sea Slug!

On a side note, I think Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are really ugly human beings.